For Baby Boomers, Gen X, Millennials and Gen Z…..2020 was undoubtedly one of the most eventful years of all time! We discovered the meaning of the word ‘pandemic’. Covid-19 took so much from us, but it also gave us a new outlook on life. Being alive is no longer a fact to take for granted. It’s a reason to wake up every morning and say “Thank You God”.
When the year begun, I was excited because I was turning 33- the famous ‘Jesus Year’. The Urban Dictionary describes the ‘Jesus Year’ as follows: ‘The 33rd year of your life where you are reborn in some sense. Perhaps a mid-life crisis, perhaps an ego-death, perhaps the year where you abandon old ways and start new …. or perhaps you were affixed to a cross and came out the other side a spiritual figure that historians, theologians, worshipers and dissenters make the subject of many a conversation.’ I didn’t know what my ‘Jesus Year’ held in store for me, but I felt it would be pivotal to my life. Also, I had plans….carefully laid out plans for my life! Then lo and behold, the first Covid-19 case hit Kenya in mid-March and the country went into full lockdown- 3 weeks before my birthday! Since nobody really knew the gravity of what we were dealing with, I assumed in a month or two, we would be back on the grind and I could still celebrate my birthday in style! Little did I know that that was just the beginning of a massive tidal wave that was about to hit my life.
One of the greatest lessons I learnt in 2020 was to be very intentional in prayer and as explicit as possible. At the beginning of the year I had asked God to change my life. I kept repeating this prayer over and over again. I needed a change in my life, but I just didn’t know why it felt so urgent. Little did I know that God would change my life, but not in the way I imagined. One by one, things begun to unfold, and layers of my life started to be peeled back, like you would an onion. I begun to lose the very things that I thought defined me- things that I had held very closely to my heart. Everything begun to unravel. I can only describe it as a tsunami in slow-motion! It wrecked havoc on anything and everything in its path- my mental health, my relationships, my emotional capacity, my job, material stuff, finances- everything! My mind could not begin to comprehend what had happened. Till today, I still get chills in my bones at how everything quickly went south.
Months later, I reflected and compared my encounter to a kind of ‘death experience’ similar to what Jesus went through when He faced His biggest defining moment. At just 33, He needed to fulfil His Father’s Will of dying a shameful death and carrying the sins of the entire world upon Himself in order to save humanity. In the metaphorical sense, the person I had been for a long time ‘died’ in 2020. I examined my life and could not quite comprehend who I was anymore. I had lost my identity in the rat race of life and work, and adopted a false identity as I tried to ‘keep up with the Joneses’ of the world. But the beauty about rock-bottom experiences like mine, is the fact that they give you a fresh chance to align things and redefine your life’s purpose and vision.
In the past one year and several months, I have become more intuitive and spiritual than I have ever been my whole life. I have forged a deeper relationship with God that has given my life more meaning and depth. I have since reclaimed my power from people’s opinions and learnt the beauty of being authentic and true to myself. I have learnt to love, honour and value myself more, while appreciating my contribution in this earth.
I hold my ‘Jesus Year’ experience close to my heart because ‘where I was wounded, is where light entered’ (Rumi). I’m a changed person because of my ‘Jesus Year’.
Always,
Posh 💕
